At times, when fear and solitude seem to crush all beauty, the best thing to do is to remain in love.
TO BEGIN WITH
Strength. A word many of us mere mortals need these days. I don’t have to explain why. You know you need it, too. I have my one and only God, who promised to never leave me or forsake me. I believe Him, and with Him I find strength. My Almighty Father, who I would be lost without. But I would also be lost without my split-apart. She is my best friend here on earth. The one God gave me to really know who I am. My works connect us when we are apart and when we come together. Especially when we are together. The years have come and gone, trials, troubles, and a little bit of everything, still we are left with what we have built between us.
I’d be lost without my friends, too. In addition to the ones I can reach out and touch, my closest friends are music and books. The house is full of both. Fortunately for me my earth-best friend feels the same as I do about both words and music. An added source of strength we should all remember to call on is our past experiences and the lessons we’ve learned from them. Finally, faith in God rather than our own selves will help us get through the toughest times. I need not elaborate the reality of that.
REMAINING IN LOVE
But we can do nothing.
Circumstances do not allow us to be with them or the person is closed to any kind of assistance or support.
Then all we are left with is love.
At such times – when we can do nothing else – we can remain in love. Without expecting anything. Reward, change, or appreciation.
If we do this, love will begin to ease away all worries.
I know of a young man who is working out of the country and he worries that his wife is seeing another man while he was away. At last, after two years, he goes home and meets her again.
That moment when he looked into her eyes once more, all worries went away. All anxieties, nightmares, and fears. This is not meant to gossip. I wrote this down so we may never forget: perfect love casts out fear.
One thing I learned traveling through life all these years is that love is ever present in the small things and manifests itself in the simplest of actions.
It is necessary therefore to remain in love, to keep it always, regardless of circumstances.
To remain in love is to not hold it back, even when the one you love is not around to experience it.
Picking up the phone and saying the affectionate words we have been postponing. Opening the door to someone who couldn’t. Asking a waiter for a glass of water or the extra chili sauce. Asking forgiveness for our mistakes and admitting what we have done. Humbly requesting a right that is ours. Paying our bus fare. Opening a bank account. Closing a bank account. Putting music on really loud when the person we love is far away. And turning the volume down when he or she is near. Knowing when to say “yes” or “no”. Discovering a sport that can be played by two. Knowing when to admit we love someone with all our heart, mind, and soul. And, of course, telling them. Not following any formula, not even the ones in this paragraph, because love is creative.
And when all else fails, when loneliness and worries still linger because of the beloved’s absence, remember this story.
A flower dreamed day and night for the rain to come. But nothing fell all through the summer months.
The flower, however, continued to dream. During the long, warm nights she imagined a heaven full of his drops, which descends to bestow fond kisses.
By doing this, she was able to appreciate the grass around, show affection to bees flying about, and be friendly to the moon watching above.
She was able to last day after day, when she would continue to care for all the busyness around her all over again.
One night, the moon, who knew of the flower’s loneliness and longing for the rain, asked: “Aren’t you tired of waiting?”
“Possibly, but I have to keep trying.”
“Why?”
“Because if I don’t remain in love, I will simply fade away. And one day, who knows, rain might come.”
At times, when fear and solitude seem to crush all beauty, the best thing to do is to remain in love.
Then all we are left with is love.
At such times – when we can do nothing else – we can remain in love. Without expecting anything. Reward, change, or appreciation.
If we do this, love will begin to ease away all worries.
I know of a young man who is working out of the country and he worries that his wife is seeing another man while he was away. At last, after two years, he goes home and meets her again.
That moment when he looked into her eyes once more, all worries went away. All anxieties, nightmares, and fears. This is not meant to gossip. I wrote this down so we may never forget: perfect love casts out fear.
One thing I learned traveling through life all these years is that love is ever present in the small things and manifests itself in the simplest of actions.
It is necessary therefore to remain in love, to keep it always, regardless of circumstances.
To remain in love is to not hold it back, even when the one you love is not around to experience it.
Picking up the phone and saying the affectionate words we have been postponing. Opening the door to someone who couldn’t. Asking a waiter for a glass of water or the extra chili sauce. Asking forgiveness for our mistakes and admitting what we have done. Humbly requesting a right that is ours. Paying our bus fare. Opening a bank account. Closing a bank account. Putting music on really loud when the person we love is far away. And turning the volume down when he or she is near. Knowing when to say “yes” or “no”. Discovering a sport that can be played by two. Knowing when to admit we love someone with all our heart, mind, and soul. And, of course, telling them. Not following any formula, not even the ones in this paragraph, because love is creative.
And when all else fails, when loneliness and worries still linger because of the beloved’s absence, remember this story.
A flower dreamed day and night for the rain to come. But nothing fell all through the summer months.
The flower, however, continued to dream. During the long, warm nights she imagined a heaven full of his drops, which descends to bestow fond kisses.
By doing this, she was able to appreciate the grass around, show affection to bees flying about, and be friendly to the moon watching above.
She was able to last day after day, when she would continue to care for all the busyness around her all over again.
One night, the moon, who knew of the flower’s loneliness and longing for the rain, asked: “Aren’t you tired of waiting?”
“Possibly, but I have to keep trying.”
“Why?”
“Because if I don’t remain in love, I will simply fade away. And one day, who knows, rain might come.”
At times, when fear and solitude seem to crush all beauty, the best thing to do is to remain in love.
- from "Coffee and Mornings", 2010 essays
Random Thoughts
Nothing beautiful comes easy.
Aim for the moon. The worst that could happen is you’ll miss and end up tumbling to the stars.
Poem of the Week
by Raymund Tamayo
To write about you is easy ---
compare it to a sailor's voyage
over clear waters,
or a master baker baking butter cookies.
To praise or talk about you ---
that is the challenge,
it would do more harm to me than good.
Within my own heart's head,
I remember full moons in Gordon Heights,
school corridors and back stage kisses,
a Sunday walk along Waterdam Road,
cold nights of warm hugs and fireflies.
Did you know
that some pages in my journal are blotted and unused?
Those must have been the happiest of times,
for who can jot down happiness while it is happening?
(July 2000)
AND FINALLY
August continues to chug through. Let's hold on, dear friend. Hold on.
Thanks for stopping by - see you when I see you.
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